Who's behind this fast food conspiracy?


In a discussion with an associate today, I believe we stumbled on the most overlooked conspiracy in America. What the hell is the deal with fast food places hoarding ketchup packets from paying customers?! Is there some reason, “Can I get ketchup?” means, “Hey, I’d like just two packets. You know, enough to handle about 3 of your freedom fries, here.” And, if you have the audacity to ask for more, they only bump you up to three packets? Is there some agreement between the sandwich monarch and that ridiculous clown to show us lowly, drive-thru peasants that they control the condiments and there’s nothing we can do about it? Do the kids working the window get a pay cut if they hand me a handful of ketchup packets? Is ISIS using fast food ketchup to fund their nefarious goals? Are ketchup packets used in some god-awful country I’ve never heard of as currency? If so, what’s the exchange rate? I’d probably pay it. I just want enough ketchup for my fries, man. Who is behind this assault on my dietary freedom? Is there someone I can talk to about this? Or someone I can waterboard into submission? This is starting to keep me up at night… Thoughts on this?





Depending on where you go, yes, it can be crazy.

Having spent a lot of time in Hong Kong, I can tell you it is a lot worse there for ketchup, mustard, napkins, etc. Sometimes, they will only give you one ketchup, one napkin, even though you ordered several burgers and orders of fries. And for that matter, generally they don’t give free refills on anything other than water.

So, I feel for you, not fun not having all the ketchup (and other accessories), that you need. But, at least it is nowhere near as bad as some other countries (such as Hong Kong).


:us: That’s why I’m proud to be an American, JohnB :us: Lol

I think you just gave me an idea, tho. I’m gonna take an inhuman amount of napkins from their dining room and attempt to ransom them back to said establishment in exchange for ketchup. This could work. I knew this was the place to come for solutions. We’re gonna win this condiment war. :hamburger::fries::cup_with_straw:




Best of luck to you in your plans. Maybe it would help give a wakeup call to some of these places.

By the way, out of all the fast food places I have been too, McDonalds has the worst track record for not packing everything (in a To Go order), that you paid for. I have learned to always check the bags stuffed with my order from McDonalds. Funny how they never make the mistake of giving me something I haven’t paid for, though!

And I am proud to be an American, too!


that’s because they don’t want you going home to make soup with the extra packets…


@srdiver IS THAT THE SECRET? Are homeless people making ketchup soup in a shopping cart behind the alley of the, almost certainly, nearby Wal-Mart? There must be a way to prove I’m not part of the ketchup soup uprising. I thought paying for my food was proof enough. Is there a form I can fill out? There must be a peaceful resolution to this condiment denial.


Lol. I have noticed this problem too! I have since for the past several years, described my order to the genius attendant behind the microphone and specify I need a shitload of ketchup, a shitload of taco sauce, a shitload of sweet and sour sauce! If they do not comply or ask how many is a shitload, I specify about 30 to 40 packets please! If they still do not comply I will sit there and hold up the entire drive-thru, get out of my car while still parked in the drive thru, and go into the store and ask for a manager! At this time, they are more than happy to give me my shitload of condiments I requested. I try to to hit these same places when I go, I have never had an issue since I specify shitload, I get a shitload!


Welcome to America In my old FD AO [inner city] the natives are always complaining online about the horrible service at their McD’s,BK, Popeyes :roll_eyes: KFC:roll_eyes: Canadian fried chicken etc… The welfare crowd complaining about their own lazy and bad peeps is hysterical.
You have all seen the videos of them fighting with the McBurger attendants
At least they are working…barely.


@LonewolfMcQuade, you’re a true patriot. I like your style. :+1::+1::+1:


I think I’m in love.



Hope they never catch her!



@SAK That’s 70. She tried to get 70 packets. Those are rookie numbers. She’s gotta pump that up. Tackle the attendant, get in the back, take ketchup by the case, kick the guy down a well. THIS IS SPARTA!.. i mean, KETCHUP! THIS IS KETCHUP! We must free the condiment packets from the chains of their oppressive overlords.


@DarkCornerGunworks :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:


bottom line, the less you give out, higher the profit margin…



Unacceptable. It’s 7 bucks for a meal worm burger. The least they can do is throw in the ketchup to cover the taste. Steak houses give away unlimited yeast rolls and still make profit. Ketchup packets can’t cost what a freaking roll does. Who do you work for? Did the ketchup overlords send you? They sent you here to infiltrate our uprising, didn’t they? You tell those tomato hoarding bastards we won’t go down without a fight! :rofl:


If you ever watched that ketchup be made you might not want the one pack they gave you!


I don’t care if it’s made with orphan tears and whale :poop:. I WANT MY KETCHUP! Lol


Don’t you know…all of this is controlled by the ketchup cartels?!
They’ve been smuggling this stuff down into the inner cities for years…I’ve heard that there is a literal king of ketchup somewhere down along the Louisiana border…he goes by Ronald. From everything I’ve heard that dude is hard core! He’s got an entire gang ready and willing to burglarize homes and steal ketchup from bottles just so they can put it in little plastic packets and sell it on street corners to high school kids and rednecks in pickup trucks! I mean, I can’t believe you haven’t heard of this! It’s going faster than crack and meth combined!!!